If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
