Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
The uberlube is also flammable
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
