I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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