i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
