My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you win again, gameday.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
