He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
