Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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