I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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