Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Quick, to the slutcave!
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
how does that bad decision feel?
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