Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
