i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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