And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Oh god it's open bar.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
