We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Randomize