I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
