If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
