She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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