I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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