I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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