Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
