I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
