curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
