9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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