butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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