guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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