Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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