try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
