Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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