I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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