i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Randomize