Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
