Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize