I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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