so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
