Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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