So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
