There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
