people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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