you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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