She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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