Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize