Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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