Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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