I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
