ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We were destined to go to rehab together
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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