We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
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