Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
