Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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