I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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