That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize
