she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
