I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Randomize
